Perfection is a Lie: Three Tips to Staying Healthy and Fit all Year Long, Author: Carolina Marrelli, I.N.H.C.

If you are like most people, you were excited about 2023 and went into the new year wearing rose-colored glasses. Maybe you had even written out some resolutions/goals for yourself and began with gusto. Until something called REAL LIFE came to town and then they went right out the window….am I right? Yeah, I thought so. Do not worry, it happens to the best of us. So why not just give up now and call 2023 a wash?

Um NO!

I am not letting you do that because your God-given calling, and life purpose cannot wait!!! If you do not take care of YOU…how are you going to have the energy you need to go after what God put in your heart to do AND take care of what you already have on your plate – like your marriage, your kids, or your career, etc.?

Women tend to approach goals in a way that makes it almost impossible to maintain the kind of results that we want or hope for because of something called PERFECTIONISM. Which, friendly reminder: Perfection does not exist. So today, permission is hereby granted to be imperfect….to have flaws and scars. Trust me, I sure do have them too!

Please hear me: Your future self and aaaalllll the lives that you are destined to impact for the better are counting on you to fight for yourself and your wellness.

If you are working on establishing any new habit, your chances of success will drastically improve when you change your expectations of yourself. Some days, your best will be that of a total rockstar, and others…not so much. And guess what? That is totally okay.

Now that we have covered THAT…. I would like to give you three simple tips that will help you to stay healthy – and fit – all year long.

1. Set Performance-Based Goals Instead of Results-Based Goals

   A lot of people feel motivated when they start to see results. I know I sure do! But it is so, so important that you remember that you cannot rush the process. Whether you are trying to implement a new sleep routine, or you are working on increasing your water intake, or shedding some extra weight/fat. If you are only focusing on a number, you are setting yourself up for frustration.

   You need to find a way to replicate the sense of accomplishment that you get from seeing results. Setting goals that are realistic and healthy to achieve in a short period of time can help you achieve this feeling. For example, you might set a goal to go to bed ten minutes earlier or drink a glass of water instead of soda at lunch this week. This is a performance-based goal and will give you the satisfaction of accomplishing something. That way, even if physical results are taking some time to show, you will still have the excitement of moving forward in a different way, AND you will be moving closer to your destined health/energy level changes, so babe, this is a winner for sure.

2. Set Habit-Based Goals

   Another fantastic mini-goal would be to set habit-based goals and take it one day and one step at a time. I am doing this with myself! I have been wanting my abs to be more toned, so I decided that I was going to do a few minutes of ab work – IN MY BED – before I even get OUT of the bed, on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. Anything else is the cherry on top. For example, let us say you drink soda at lunch 7/7 days a week. The first step would not be to change that to 0/7 days a week. You would be cranky as hell from the caffeine and sugar withdrawals and miserable to be around. It would be to decrease that to only having soda at lunch five days a week, then three, then one.
   If you keep “falling off the wagon,” but continue to go after your goals in the same rigid ways, it does not allow much room for a long-term habit change. In this case, the problem would be going into each week, expecting every single day to be PERFECT, and what do I say about perfection? It does not exist.

   So, if the few previous weeks were not so wonderful, it makes a lot more sense to take it one step at a time and work your way up to your ideal new habits! In my coaching – and life experience – changes that are made drastically usually do not stick for long at all.  Find little things to keep you excited and motivated!

3. Be Okay with Some Mess-Ups

   You need to be okay with mess-ups and mistakes because you are human, and they are going to happen. Of course, this does not mean you give yourself permission to be lazy or should not care about them and not maintain any discipline whatsoever! But it does not mean that you should be beating yourself up on repeat, talking down to yourself to the point where you feel like totally giving up. Your self-talk matters. We are often our own worst critic. I mean really. Would you talk to a small child or a friend the way you talk to yourself when you screw up? No way!

   People get so hung up on their mess-ups and feel so, so guilty and ashamed about it. This often ends up making things WORSE, and it will bring your motivation down even further.
   Ebbs and flows, ups and downs are a normal part of everyone’s journey, and that does not mean that you will not reach your goals! You must use them to your advantage by learning from them and figuring out how to do better moving forward. You can do this! I believe in you!!!!